These two people are why special education law is personal to me.

I’d like you to meet my mom, Jeanette, and my sister, Debbie. Debbie was born in 1960. In 1961, she was diagnosed with severe mental retardation. The doctors told my parents that Debbie would never walk or talk. With other children in the household, the doctors told my parents that they should institutionalize her. In 1961, that meant placing her in Belchertown State School. Although it was the norm at the time, it was unthinkable to my parents. In the face of many hardships, they kept Debbie at home. We have a truly amazing extended family, but outside the family, the world could be very cruel.

After watching my first Facebook Live event, my mom sent me an email that included the following: “ Thank you for doing this.  I wish someone like you was there 60 years ago, but of course, none of this technology or research was happening then.  All I got was ‘God never sends you more than you can handle’ and ‘she’s a special gift from God’.  I believe that now, but it wasn’t what I needed at the time, and certainly didn’t help to deal with her screaming in frustration because she couldn’t speak, and cleaning up a six year old in diapers, etc.  Thank God, she turned out to be the social butterfly that she became as an adult! No IEP’s back then either, so no power to the parents.  I will never forget what Miss Brown said to me at Howard street School.  ‘She’ll never amount to anything!  She’s autistic.’  Sorry to vent like this, but this brought it all back.  Now 60 years later, parents are still fighting for what will give their child a chance, but at least they have people like you to help them.  I am so proud of you!  Now I can go back to forgetting about all the struggles and enjoy Deb’s accomplishments.”

Let’s talk about Debbie accomplishments! Not only did she learn how to talk, but she has her own telephone and loves to call us and chat. Not only did she learn how to walk, but last year she sang and danced in Pathlight’s annual variety show, Let’s Dance! She was also a square dancer for years. She is especially proud of her medals and ribbons which she has won swimming for Special Olympics. She fully participates in our church activities. I often tease her that she has a more active social life than I do! Despite the early naysayers, Debbie has indeed flourished and thrived.

My mom is my other inspiration. She downplays how hard she fought for Debbie and for other kids like her. The rights that students and families have today exist precisely because my mom and other parents like her refused to give up on their children. In addition to pushing for expansion of educational access, my mom was one of the founding members, and first president, of The Guild for Exceptional Children. The Guild persuaded the Diocese of Springfield to provide religious education to children with disabilities and to allow them to receive the Sacraments. In addition, the group provided socialization activities for these children and their families, who were often isolated socially. The Guild for Exceptional Children was the predecessor to the flourishing community now known as Jericho in Holyoke, Massachusetts.

Throughout Debbie’s life, my mom has advocated for her and her peers. After winding up a career at Mass Mutual, she went back to college to obtain her masters degree in education, so that she could work in the field of adult habilitation. She has worked at a day habilitation program, organizing volunteer activities for clients to gain work experience, as well as managing residential homes for adults with varying degrees of independence. She has served as health care proxy for many of her clients who no longer had families of their own, and she maintains close friendships with many of her former clients. Even in retirement, she serves on Human Rights Committees for two organizations, and she reviews human rights complaints for the Department of Developmental Services.

I’m in awe of both my sister and my mom for all that they have overcome. They are my inspiration for advocating for children with special needs and their families.